Thoughts on my crisis

[Blood Ravenous]

Sounds like at first she said what she thought you wanted to hear, like she wanted to please you so you'd go away or do what she wanted. What she's saying now may not even be the case, she may just want to reject you for other reasons but doesn't want to admit it. (I dunno, I wasn't there and I don't know what she said/did. Hazarding a guess.)

I've also found being nice is really hard. Most of the time people don't appreciate it. It's not a big deal to me that they appreciate it, but sometimes it's irksome that someone doesn't take advice or totally rejects my kindness. Oh, and especially when they go out of their way to totally annihilate it. It's also hard with relationships, either dealing with someone you don't like that you want to let down softly that doesn't get it, or someone you love being an ass and trying to tell them so (<~ can't do that nicely though, most of the time).

I would definitely just stay away from her if she's having problems that so severely affect your relationship when you aren't part of the problem. (I don't see how you yourself would be a problem.) It may be hard to get over her but when you do you'll be better for it and probably meet someone really great I hope you feel better.

PS You didn't say too much, I love helping or at least hearing about people's problems. It's kinda fun in an interesting way... not to be mean or anything, I just like figuring people out. XP

[Shadowsong]

The guest was me by the way. Mistake with 'back' button.

It seems set in stone that the girl and I will be having nothing to do with one another. We don't see each other in our general lives so letting her know anything would be difficult. I refuse to chase her down to tell her since that is too close to a stalker for my liking. It was garbage when she said it and I intend it to stay that way.

Of course, if word of me with my next girlfriend does reach her that would suit me just fine. I think it is only fair that she sees what she has lost.

Falling for a girl with issues sucks. Really sucks. But the damage is done now so that means no more is coming. I wish her luck dealing with her issues. Despite my bitterness.

I think Ice is right about what the girl says now not being the case. Her story changes too much. Eg; the letter in the first post, story 1 is it made her feel she was to stay away, story 2 is it made her feel pressured to contact me.

There are probably other reasons why she chose to reject my friendship that she doesn't want to admit. There is evidence for that theory. For one, her problems with me were inconsistent with our history - she said at the meeting she was worried how I would react to things (ie; how I would take them, not about me lashing out), but one of the things that always bothered her was that I was too calm and controlled about things - the very fact that I didn't react to things. The fact that she cried counts as well. Then she said there were reasons too complicated for me to understand - but according to her I'm the more intelligent one so she can't honestly believe I'd not understand it. Then she said that she needed it to be over now, why would she need it to be over? It has to be more than just me.

And Ice, something more you said. You said you didn't see how I could be the problem. Thanks, I'm glad someone who knows what happened doesn't think I was part of the problem. But why? What convinced you that none of this was my fault? I know a lot of people could be blind to their own mistakes.

And I don't think it's mean to enjoy figuring people out, I'm exactly the same way. Thank you.

[Blood Ravenous]

~~~>And Ice, something more you said. You said you didn't see how I could be the problem. Thanks, I'm glad someone who knows what happened doesn't think I was part of the problem. But why? What convinced you that none of this was my fault? I know a lot of people could be blind to their own mistakes.<~~~

Your bewilderment, mainly. I know it's just text but the way you felt about the situation still came through by how you phrased things. I've noticed people either feel guilty or blame it on themselves. You didn't accuse her, but you couldn't pinpoint anything you've done that would merit her actions. So I figured you really didn't do anything. Knowing further that people will lie and be difficult with others when they don't want to be upfront also helped.

~~~>And I don't think it's mean to enjoy figuring people out, I'm exactly the same way. Thank you.<~~~

I meant that I didn't want you to think I was malicious in enjoying your problems. But yeah, your welcome (^_^)

Hmm, why don't quotes work?

[Shadowsong]

Not quite sure I followed that. Might be something to do with it being 5:15 in the morning though.

Since I suppose we're all writers here text would get feelings across pretty nicely. Half the fun in writing really.

Did you mean 'people either feel guilty or blame it on others' ? Just checking.

Could you explain what you mean by I didn't accuse her?

[Blood Ravenous]

Yeah, I did mean "others," sorry (^_^; )

You didn't accuse her of being the one in full charge of what happened. You kept saying "what did I do?".

[Shadowsong]

Ah, thank you. Yes.

And Ice, please don't apologise. You've been nothing but helpful.

There was not much point to blaming her really. I wanted to fix whatever was wrong, my only interest was in what could be done about the situation. Whose fault it was wouldn't do anything to change the situation, though maybe I tend to be a little too practical about this sort of thing.

[Xyon_of_Calhoun]

Shadow... sorry to ressurect this one, but since "such drama in life" appears to be dead, I thought the people might want an update...

That is if you don't mind. I might be overstepping the line here but hey, what are best friends for?

*slaps on back, causing shadow to choke*

oops.

Anyway, the mike's yours, the stage is set... whatever. I need a cigarette and can't be arsed. Your choice.

[phoenixbyrd]

She sounds like a psycho btw, just my two cents.

[Shadowsong]

Xyon, flogging dead horses tends to upset animal charities, some of which I have worked for.

My update is this; the details are not my place to discuss, what is important is that innocents have now suffered at this girls hands. The woman has gone too far.

I could forgive the way she has toyed with my feelings, as recently as within the past month. Associating with her now would be condoning what she has done.

There is no room for cowards and backstabbers in my life. And she has no right to a place in my heart.

There. We have an update. Happy?

[Jenica Sabiny]

You know, if you'd just gotten the fuck away from her when I told you to...

Hehe.

I'm glad to hear that you're finally doing just that. Manipulative jerks never change their tune, they just modify it a little to make you stick around.

[Xyon_of_Calhoun]

When does talking to you make me happy, shadow?

what is important is that innocents have now suffered at this girls hands

These would be?

[Shadowsong]

And now she has been trying to phone me. Today.

Apparantly there are alot of things she wants to talk to me about, and she is gutted about what I think of her.

I just want to scream out 'IF YOU WANT MY APPROVAL STOP DOING EVIL THINGS!!!!!'

This has gotten rediculous. In fact, it started off rediculous and now it is getting sillier. Why does my life have to be in such silly patterns.

[Jenica Sabiny]

You could always just ignore her...

[Shadow]

Yeah, I could...

Yeah, I did...

Doesn't make it any less rediculous.

[Jen]

You're not wrong. Just always remember that it takes two to create drama: one starting it, and one taking the bait.