Hadrius, The Shadow

[Hadrius]

Hadrius, The Shadow

History: Many Marn citizens have a hateful fire inside them that is tended by the oppressive laws of their city, one man that has such anger toward authority is Hadrius, or as the law enforcers know him, Hadrius, The Shadow. Hadrius was born and raised in the city of Marn. His father and mother were burned in front of him as a child, as they were accused of being magic users. But because of this event, he grew to hate the soldiers and administrators of this city, and swore to his forbidden gods and dead parents that he would kill and destroy the evil government of Marn. After his parents were killed, the guards of the city forced him into the barracks, thinking that this would help him become one of them, but it only taught Hadrius how to fight and how they fought. Bur even after he left the barracks, he continued to train himself in the arts of archery, thievery, and assassination. And so, the hero of the oppressed, Hadrius, The Shadow, is made.

Characteristics:
-Race: Human
-Sex: Male
-Height: 6'
-Weight: 177 Pounds (Mainly Muscle, Skin, and Bone, Hadrius has little fat on his body)
-Skin Color: Pale
-Hair Color: Dark Brown
-Eye Color: Green
-Body Structure: Skinny but muscular

Equipment: Tough Leather Shoulder Pads/Gloves/Chest-Plate/Boots, Dark Grey Mottled Cloth Robe/Cowl, Ragged Wool Under Garments, Scarlet Tunic, One Black Leather Belt, Two Short Swords, Eight Throwing Knives, Short Bow, Two Short Sword Sheaths, One Hand Axe, Arrows, Flint And Steel Fire Kit

Special Abilities:
-Above Average Eyesight
-Above Average Hearing
-Above Average Smelling
-Above Average Agility and Speed
-Very Stealthy

Weakness:
-Overly Zealous
-Very Little Mercy or Emotion While Fighting

Other:
Hadrius's main goal is to assassinate as many guard captains and politicians as he can, and as of now, he has never been caught and has been very successful with taking down leadership.

[Metarie]

Hi,

Thanks for applying!

As written, this character cannot be approved.

A few things of note.

Membership
Any player under the age of 16 is required to provide parental or legal guardian consent to the administrator of the site due to possible site story line material. This rule is not negotiable.

Faking an age or faking consent in order to RP means you will not respect the other rules or players of the site.

The character:
He is a good concept and reminds me a bit of The Green Arrow. A character of this type is better suited to an MMO or RPG focused on Superheroes.

Strengths and Weaknesses: His overzealous nature would naturally result in mistakes. He may be driven to assassinate, but being so successful at this point is questionable. Marn has a well-established military police force and many lawful citizens. His strengths and successes are excessive for a first character. First and foremost, our site is about writing and character development. His weaknesses are insufficient and should be explored further.

Race: Wisp-wraith is not a known race and would need to be explored further. Not that the race isn't possible, only that we would need to get a better understanding and description of the race for inclusion in the setting. Racial abilities need to be called out.

How his family came to be in Marn would also need to be called out. So, a little more history would be good.

Reading the entire setting and rules section may help. Also, looking at active character profiles and reading through threads would be to help further understand the setting.

All in all, a good concept! He is just not ready for prime-time on Thar. I am locking this thread until parental or guardian consent is provided to the site admin.