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Elihai

Posted: Sat May 02, 2015 10:01 pm
by Elihai
Name: Elihai.
Age: Thirty-five.
Race: Human.

Physical Description:
  • Skin: Bronze (tan), dusty rose (sunburned cheeks and shoulders), light brown. Scars from being beaten with a heavy stick.
    Tattoos: One behind each ear.
    Hair: Mid-length, wavy, dagger-cut, dirty blond, usually tied back.
    Facial hair: Dagger-shaven.
    Eyes: Strong-coffee brown, almond-shaped.
    Height: 5' 10".
    Build: Average.
Possessions:
  • Knife: Mughal dagger.
    Churchwarden pipe.
    Flagon.
    Horse: Butterscotch Rouncey. Name: Orko.
    High saddle and Baroque tack: Paid for.
    Beaten, stained tunic.
    Brown, leather breeches.
    Brown, leather boots.
    One set stolen greaves: Leather.
    One set stolen cuisses: Leather.
    One set stolen polyens: Leather.
    One set stolen sabatons: Leather.
    One set stolen gauntlets: Leather.
Powers or Strengths:
Sleight of Hand:
  • He's quick with his fingers. Now you see them. Now you don't.
Liar, Liar:
  • This could be a flaw as easily as it could be a strength. He talks in circles and omits the truth with the best of them.
Lock Picking:
  • Has an above-common knowledge of locks and how to get past them. He's, by no means, an expert.
Pick Pocket:
  • Keep your valuables somewhere safe.
Weaknesses and Flaws:
Hot-Tempered:
  • If it frustrates him, it gets a blow.
Addicted:
  • Opium and marijuana are his vices of choice. If a person were looking for him, opium dens would be the first place to look.
Outcast:
  • He's never going back to Tian Xia. You can't make him.

History:

The first thing you must have in order to be a proper thief: A need.

Need is a universal experience. All creatures feel pangs when without food, water, sex, love, or air, and, so, this first requirement isn't hard to come by. It's a quite natural phenomenon: Need. We are conceived in desire. We are born gasping for breath and screaming out hunger. All-in-all, it's a very unremarkable experience.

The second thing you must have to be a proper thief is a sustained inability to meet those needs, desires, wants.

The third thing is more complicated. Maybe it's a lax moral or ethical code, depending on what you've been told about morals or ethics.

And the fourth, and most important, thing you must have to be a proper thief: An opportunity.

Just such an opportunity presented itself to Elihai at the ripe age of six.

His father had traded fish in Tian Xia, but a bad investment paired with a shipwreck left their sizable family in a consistently deepening debt.

His older sisters were sent to whore and he was sent to beg in the streets. Maybe he was an entitled child. Maybe he was prideful. Maybe that's the third, more complicated thing you need in order to be a proper thief. And Elihai definitely had that.

It was hard, all over.

And so begging did little to curb the gnawing in his bony sides.

A day's worth of begging put no bread on the table and he was too small to properly work.

When you're six and starving, maybe it's easier to go against what you've been told about stealing.

The first thing he stole was an apple. The apple was pink, smooth-skinned, sweet. When he bit into it, in an alley in the market, it burst in his mouth, sent his eyes rolling back in his head.

You could call this the inciting incident.

The fifth thing you need in order to be a proper thief is an inability to learn from being beaten.

He'd be beaten a thousand times to taste another apple like that.

Re: Elihai

Posted: Tue May 12, 2015 4:30 pm
by Katona
Welcome to Thar, Elihai!

A minimalistic type of application is fine, but there are a few things I'd like to see changed/added:

First, the physical description should be a written description as opposed to a list, if you don't mind.

Please mention in strengths if he has any skill/experience fighting with his dagger, unless he just uses it as a tool.

I'd like you to elaborate on his being an outcast. If you'd like to explore the specific details in RP, that's okay, but I need some indication of what kind of situation it is and how it has affected his life.

For the outcast thing as well as the rest of his life experiences, I'd like some insight into how these many difficult life experiences have affected him, including things such as his outlook on life and his mental state. You might like to delve into his beliefs, hopes and fears, morals, uncertainties, how he views and interacts with other people, and anything else you can think of. Perhaps you can include a personality section. Currently, there's very little indication of who your character is as an individual. Don't forget to include the effects of his drug addiction!

Overall, the idea itself is fine. Just need to pin down the details a little. :D

Reply to this thread when you're ready for me to look at your app again. If you have any questions or need anything, feel free to PM me or another mod, catch someone in chat, or just reply here. Have fun!